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The Chicken and the Egg

9/27/2012

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WARNING: THIS MAY BE CONSIDERED CONTROVERSIAL

Last night, I was the unfortunate witness to a Facebook bullying and criticism of my dear cousin's "lifestyle."

He's gay, people, let's just say it, he's openly gay with no regrets. Moving on.

So what happened was he posted something about Chick-fil-A on Facebook, and
another (somewhat estranged) family member started attacking him simply for being gay. This bully was attacking a family member, someone he grew up playing
with as young boys on the island of Puerto Rico.

How did we all get here? Where a family member is attacking another?! At one point, someone said to this gay-hating cousin, "How could you say these things?
You're a minority!" Thing is, he didn't see himself as a minority even though he's Puerto Rican (it's a small island). As a white, heterosexual, Christian male, he considered himself in the majority and with the power to bully "everybody else."

How fascinating. He could not see his own vulnerability and therefore was unable to develop empathy. This man exists in a bubble where he is king and what he says goes.

You usually see this kind of behavior mostly in...well, kings. Or that modern version of royalty, the 1%.

What's funny to me is the reason that the controversial 1% wins so many battles is that they have managed to convince the 99% that they are all separated into a very careful hierarchy of importance. American, white, Christian, heterosexual, male is the highest level in this hierarchy, right? Then deductions follow according to religion, sexual orientation, ethnicity, skin color and sex.

But if you start adding up all the possible minorities - women (ha), Jews, Muslims, Asians, Indians, LGBT, little people, blonds, paraplegics, Irish, Atheists, etc. - you're going to find that the minorities are in the majority. And the reason they get pushed around so much is that they've bought into the "us" versus "them" model that the kings have sold us over the centuries. But instead, if we adopt the "there but for the grace of God go I" model, we become powerful and plentiful and there is no stopping any of us. We will not be bullied, we will not be harassed or marginalized. We will stand together, ALL OF US, and win the war.

This is not just a movie. This is a movement.

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A Miracle

8/9/2011

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(Originally published on Kickstarter on July 29)
Since my last update a couple of days ago, we've gone up by 5%. We're over 75% funded now! Thanks for the help in spreading the word!

I'm writing to share something very personal that happened to me recently. For several months, my day job has been supporting a group of scientists at a research facility. A couple of weeks ago, some managers decided my (sometimes) cheerful disposition might be more of an asset in their corporate offices, separate from the research facility...a much more stressful environment. I fought the good fight (and by fight, I mean I mostly avoided eye contact with my managers in a desperate attempt that they would forget I was alive), but yesterday I lost the battle.

When I announced my defeat to a scientist, he expressed his disappointment and said, "You've been so good for everyone here." I was taken aback. I had known my life had been changed by working here, but I was unaware that I had helped others too.

I've hinted at it before, but I was a bit of a lonely child. I didn't really have friends until I ran off to college and joined the circus (re: moved to NYC), and even then... I was shy, awkward, nerdy, didn't fit in, and there was even more: from a young age, I'd been plagued by a debilitating anxiety disorder, hypochondria. This has always been my biggest secret, the reason why I never let anyone get too close, lest they should find out.

When I started here a few months ago, I found myself fitting right in. People started coming up to my desk and staying for a long chat, or they'd take their coffee break around my desk area and stay for an hour. I learned about their lives, their wives, their projects. They asked me about filmmaking and acting, and were actually interested. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was making friends. This had never happened to me in a work environment.

In time, I even started being open about my anxiety, something that I would never have done in a million years a few months ago. Eventually, a new friend at work recommended a book, The Power of Now. I'd tried reading it before, but something made me promise him that I would read it again. At the same time, he also recommended to a mutual work friend another book about physical health. We both set on our journey to improve our health, he his physical health, me my emotional health. Of course, I'd tried to confront it before, but without much success. This time it felt different. I felt stronger, like I could finally confront it. I was inspired watching my friend take this book everywhere with him, and I began to do the same.

I only realize now, after my coworker said that to me yesterday, why I felt powerful enough to finally confront something that had been terrorizing me for most of my life. I had the support of a community. I had friends. And in turn, everyone here had a friend in me, which is why I was good for this place. We were a multi-racial community of individuals from all walks of life with one common cause: we're all nerds who need friends.

It's been said a million times that a community can change the world by coming together. I just experienced that first-hand. And that's what films try to do (at least my films): inspire a community in order to change the world. These few months here have made me a better human being, and in turn, a better filmmaker.

Incidentally, nobody here has ever asked me why my skin is so white. Because at a molecular level, we're all the same, aren't we?
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    Viviana Leo

    Viviana Leo is the writer and star of White Alligator.

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